Confession

I had a glass of white wine, Purato, which is my current favourite. It is light and delicate enough to drink it by itself. I am not hungry, but I like to snack on some sunflower seeds. It is salty and bad for my teeth, but currently it is my guilty pleasure.

I am not sure if this post will ever get published as I feel embarrassed drinking alone. But on the other hand, I have to admit that it opens up a gate. Two glasses break down the whole wall that previously stopped my blogging. I just write without any challenges after a couple of glasses. Obviously it is not a great way to embark on a blogging journey, however it might gets me into a habit of writing.

week 2 – running recap

 

This week was all about work. Unfortunately not physical one, which means I hadn’t managed to fit in any runs all week. It made me doubt myself if I should really pursue with my goal to run the Richmond Half Marathon. It didn’t help that I was on a nine days work marathon either.

Ciccio
Ciccio

WD3D1 – D6: I literally just slept, went to work, came home and slept again. I ate anything that was available in canteen (which was mainly carbs) and drank very little water. I felt awful by the end of the week.

Gigi
Gigi

WD3D7: Thursday – I managed to increase my step count, but it was way below the point I wanted to be by then (10 days before the HM). I knew I had to make the call, RUN or NOT to RUN.

Coincidentally the race day falls onto the same day when we move office… it was too much pressure. After a ‘quick’ reality check I had made a conscientious decision to pull out. My mental and physical health worth more than pushing my under trained body through 13.1 miles.

I called my racing body to give him a heads up. He was very understanding and we both decided to try to fit in a HM this year. Once work is more settled. After this conversation there’s just one thing left to do…. to forgive myself. Forgive myself to not train enough and the pull out of a commitment I had made 6 months ago when I signed up.

 

At least these bad boys are not jugging. I need to learn not to judge either.

 

 

I am less than 24  hours away from identifying my future path. I have been silent for more than a month now, but it doesn’t mean I have given up on Erola. I had to seriously reconsider what I would like to achieve in life.

Tomorrow finally I meet with the only person who can shed some light on my misery. I am pissing myself  now. It could go horrible wrong or it could be super simple and productive.

If it is the first, I shall probably start looking for another job. If it is the later, I will have more time to spend here. Oh, my! I hope it is the later.

 

For now, I am trying to chill myself with some cocktail. Cheers and see you all tomorrow.

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Cocktail to calm my nerves.

Dear Diary – Week 2

Oh Monday! I might have had a glass too much in the pub last night. I literally had to power through Monday,  just to drop dead in front of telly later. Hot water situation was still not resolved. We were rushing home to make sure the plumber could come in this time. While he was working I entertained kitty, otherwise he would have destroyed his bag and tools. It would have been 1-0 to kitty. Then the darkness descended and I passed out in front of the TV. I didn’t even wake when the door closed behind the plumber. Still no hot water.

 

Tuesday: I woke to a lonely morning. P was at work and it’s only kitty and me coddled up in bed. I was on evening work duties. Had a wonderful conversation at work. I finally found someone really special. Meaningful conversation always lights up my day/week.

 

Wednesday: Finally its weekend. You might think… what? You are half way through. Yes. Maybe you, but not me. I am officially out of office today. I had great time catching up with a friend. Had a dashing apple crumble with vanilla ice cream and green tea. We promised to see each other more often before waiving goodbyes. I went home and pretty much cleaned the whole house. Cause I still cannot afford a maid. I am working on it though. I hate cleaning, and dirt and dust, which is not a great combination.

 

Thursday was the day when I did absolutely nothing, apart from watching movies in PJs, eat in bed and not brush my hair. Proud? Not really but definitely relaxed and refreshed. I caught up with my weekly beauty sleep, which was long overdue. I know, I slept a lot on Monday, however there was nothing beautiful about that.

 

Working in the morning of the belated Christmas party was like walking into a hall full of anticipation. All the topics are about the party. Girls discussing outfit and make up tips and tricks. Lads are planning a pre-party party. ‘Cause what would be a party without a pre-party party?

Then the taxi arrives and we all hop in. That’s it! Hair, make-up, dress and hills are all in place. No more preparation, no more anticipation, just fun, fun, fun. Dinner, awards and dance all night.

 

What a party! Chef surprised us with a delicious menu. I won a night stay in a five star hotel and we danced all night with P. The band was amazing. The singers were having a dance off with us on the dance floor while singing. Truly we were very well looked after.

 

Next day, we had a lay in. I was on late duties, to ensure I have a chance to soak up the last nights alcohol with a nutritious breakfast. And so this was on the menu.

breakfast-pic

Grilled sweet potato with avocado and cherry tomato. Cheddar, gorgonzola, salami milano, sausage, cranberry/seed bread with poached egg. Three mint pukka tea.

Current favourite by far!

 

My bleedings in summary:

  • I feel blessed for the meaningful conversations I had this week.
  • I feel blessed to party and have so much fun with P.
  • I feel blessed to eat what I want.

 

I hope you had a great week! Don’t forget to count your blessings and share with me.

Dear Erola – Week 1

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week 1/52

Time flies in a blink of a second. I need to make sure that I do not daydream 2017 through. I would like to make the most of it and this is the reason I am writing you.

Here I am ready to count my blessings for the first time this year!

As you know I started this year working from the early hours; as many others around the world – I am sure. This was the first time that I had Christmas off and I worked New Year Eve and Day. It was such a relief not to plan anything for the biggest party night. In the past it always caused a head ache to figure out what to do New Years Eve to festively say goodbye to the previous year. This year was different. I worked until 11 pm NYE and back again 6:30 am.

Monday was no different to any other working days. I cruised through the day and went shopping after work. We made broccoli and stilton soup in the evening. According to the recipe I found on Pinterest. That evening we watch Jack Reacher: Never go back and had an early night. Had 12 hours sleep.

We woke up that we have an hour and a half to get ready to tee off. It was a sunny chilly day and we made it eventually. Played 16 holes due to daylight restriction. The trouble with long sleeps and short daylight that you need to compromise. 1-0 to sleep on this occasion. I played to my best and thoroughly enjoyed the round. I had a slight headache throughout but took a pill midway and rubbed some cold tiger balm on my forehead and temples and a few holes later I sad goodbye to the pain. After the round we hit the bar to count out scores. Had two glasses of wine and I felt more drunk than ever. Great company and fresh air was enough to dose off at 9 pm that night.

Wednesday we hit the real low. Let alone that we had not have hot water for 24 hours already, we have been also put off from IVF for another 6 month. Ready more about it here.

Thursday I was back to work and we made up with my partner. The power of apology is remarkable. It has a healing effect on the relationship. By admitting to your partner that you are not proud of your own behaviour is deliberating. It was mutual, just as I thought. Funny how two stubborn people will not give in and than once one decides otherwise the other will follow. Smoothie of the day was Greeny (as a colleague named it). You can read more about Grenny!

Friday we were at a much better place with P. He made me a lunch box for me for work. I am in ❤️! A Mindfulness Guide for the Frazzled – you are my first book in 2017! Ruby Wax is hilarious and I cannot wait to read it all.

Saturday: Oh, you were a tough day. Being back to early after two late shifts, meant only 4 hours sleep. These changes really get to me. I used to handle these swiftly, but it gets more and more difficult with age. I bravely shared my wardrobe with you. I have a belated Christmas party coming up on Friday and I really needed you help to decide what to wear. I am not ready to invest in a new piece when I have so many. I was really nervous to pose for getting the pictures done. I have never done anything like it before. As a newbie to blogging I wasn’t expecting any response to my shout out. But I was pleasantly surprised that bloggers from around the word actually took the time to respond to it. Thanks for boosting my confidence.

Sunday: You were a bit easier to handle. After an exciting week I was glad to meet up with friends and put the week behind with some drinks in the pub. I feel blessed to hang out with you cool people.

My blessings in summary:
  • I feel blessed to have such a loving P (partner); I love him to bits!
  • I feel blessed to be able to play golf at the coolest place on Earth!
  • I feel blessed to get response from other bloggers around the world!
  • I feel blessed to have friends to hang out with!

Another day at the clinic

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Infertility

Wednesday, 4th January was the date when we would have been sent to the clinic, which can give us a chance to have a family. However we haven’t passed the vaping concern. All the results were in and papers ready, when the doctor asked the question if we smoke. We don’t smoke, however my partner vapes. It was noted when we first met the main doctor at the clinic. No concerns were risen at the introduction 2 and a half year ago. The doctor was dealing with us for the past year just assumed it was all clarified before. The main nurse offered to call the other clinic where they conduct the IVF to get further understanding – nice of her. The answer was that vaping is not yet classified any different from smoking as it is a new trend. I am not sure for how long can you call a trend new until it will become a thing, however we were let go with a no for now. I barely could control my emotions inside the treatment room, so I burst out crying once we were on the corridor. Don’t get me wrong I wasn’t crying because my partner smokes. I was crying because my expectations were much higher for such a clinic. I felt betrayed, I felt like a number when sitting in the room. Every single time we go there the doctor needs to spend at least 20 minutes just to read through the previous files. Be ready for ?/&@sake. It made me feel like standing in Mcdonalds, when they shout NEXT!

 

How my partner felt about it? He thought I am crying because he let me down. He felt small and desperate to hear something from me. However all the emotions that burst out of me at that moment left me speechless.  He was more concerned that I am disappointed in him. He didn’t wanted to see me crying.  Once I have calmed down I explained the reason of my tears. He felt better after that. He did nothing wrong, he felt the same as me.

Yello 2017

Placeholder ImageThe first day of 2017 was all sorts of crazy!

 

Starting the day munching on 12 grapes 🍇 while the Big Ben clock was ticking. Hoping that the Spanish superstition brings me some good luck for this year. I managed to get all 12 in my mouth 👄 but chewing took a but longer than that. Once I could open my mouth again I poured it down with some Da Luca Prosecco. 

Watched some TV 📺; mainly fireworks 💥 around the word, then headed to bed. All I could think about is that I need to sleep asap. I had the alarm set for 5 am. I gave a final look at my Twitter account (my second day on twitter, super excited for all sorts of action). I stumbled upon Chris Scott’s article about brand collaboration, which I found particularly helpful as a newbie blogger. It led me to another article from Siva about the social media trends in 2017.

Then I read 2-3 super long posts about bloggers’ new years resolution and their evaluation of 2016. I felt super inspired and suddenly it was 2 am and all I could think about was that I needed to be up in 3 hrs time. Finally I drifted to sleep when the alarm went off. What time is it? Have I slept 5 minutes? No… it’s time to waikie waikie! 

Quick breakfast, shower some make up to cover up my serious pillow face and off I went to work. It was a slow morning. ‘Happy New Year’ wishes were flying around the corridor with kisses and hugs. It was a mellow morning. Just what I needed with 3 more coffees. 

For lunch I had an amazing butternut squash soup 🍜 and I resisted eating bread. #proudself 

My afternoon mood was the highlight of the day. I felt super energised! Arranged a post NYE drinks with the girls. I felt like we need a proper sophisticated celebration on New Years Day. 

Happy New Year to all of you! I hope you had a great first day. What did you do?